Update

We are settling back into life in the States. However, much of our hearts is still miles away. We are fortunate to be able to stay in touch with our friends in Nigeria via the internet, but it is still just not the same. We feel so blessed to have fallen in love with so much and so many that we feel the pain of being so far away.

As many of you have requested, here is a brief update on our lives:

We are living in Pleasant View, TN, just a wee bit northwest of Nashville. We love our home and are enjoying slowly reconnecting with friends and family. Right now we are all in a rush to try to find warm clothes to wear since we've lived in tshirts and flipflops for the last 2 years. 60 degrees seems much colder than I remember! The cooler weather is allowing us to enjoy our favorite time of year for the first time in a long while-and oh, how we've missed the turning of the leaves, tobacco smokin' barns, pumpkins all around!

Jon is enjoying working at VCE. He doesn't mind the bit of traveling he must do because he loves cruising around in his dream vehicle, a black Rubicon.

Lauren is taking a full load at Austin Peay State University after graduating from high school a year early. She has had the joy of jet-setting around the country to visit friends she met in Nigeria. In less than a week, we will be celebrating her 18th birthday!

Mattie Grace continues to play her flute in the middle school band. She enjoys her new friends at school and is looking forward to high school next year!

Naomi is running for middle school Vice President. She has a platform of changing the school, community, and world with some lofty ideas. She spent the summer at various camps, with her favorite being the Herbitology one-where she learned about played with snakes, lizards, etc.

While I am job hunting, I have been fixing up our new house by stripping wallpaper, painting walls, and enjoying cooking while watching wild turkeys and deer walking through our backyard.

This month holds so much to look forward to:

Visits by different family members and friends
Helping with Shoot for the Future
Lauren's BIG birthday
Camping with friends
Fall Break
Weekend in the mountains with my girlfriends
High School reunion
Preparing for the upcoming holidays!

There is the update. More to come later.

Ten things I am thankful for and am fully enjoying:

Comfortable beds with nice linens
Hot showers-at any time!
Internet-to stay in touch
Constant, reliable electricity
Clean tap water
Music
Nice roads
Rest
Freedoms in America
Efficiency of doing laundry-never thought I’d take joy in washing clothes

Nine foods I am enjoying:

Sonic – Happy Hour ½ price drinks (love the ice)
Penne Rustica from Macaroni Grill
Sam’s Hot Dogs
Coke Zero
Mexican
Variety of cheeses
Boneless, skinless (featherless) chicken
Chinese Buffet
(if I don’t stop-Nutrisystem will be on the list!)

Eight acts of kindness from others:
Places to stay
Cars to borrow
Camps for girls to attend
Grandma and Cousins to love on the girls for an extra week
Old Fashioned Pounding
Friends who listen to us ramble about Nigeria
Emails, support, and encouragement
Visit from friends who ‘understand’ why we miss our other home

Seven foods I miss:

Pounded yam and red stew
Suya
Hummus
Schwarmas
Mangos
Avocados
Jollof Rice

Six songs I’ve been listening to lately:

Indescribable
We’re Really Not That Different
Rains Down in Africa (OLD song by Toto, but I DO miss those rains!)
My Next Thirty Years
Whatever It Takes
Someday We’ll Know

Five things I miss:

Friends-oh, how I miss them!!
Busyness
The Railroad
Glass bottles of Coke
The rains

Four things I wonder:

Will we be able to save enough money for Lauren (and me) to return to Nigeria for her graduation in May?
Will I ever feel settled here in the States?
How high will gas prices rise?
What job will I have in the future?

Three BIG things we need to purchase (after the house):

Beds for everyone
Refrigerator
Cars

Two things I have (re)learned these past two months:

Patience IS a virtue.
Relationships are more important than things.

One thing I most look forward to:

Moving into our own house

Goodbye

Seems that goodbyes have been a large part of our lives this month.

Yesterday morning my grandmother passed away.
The girls and I are making a very quick trip to the east side of the state to say goodbye.

The Checklist

1- Job for Jon found. He loves it.

2- Offer on a house was accepted. We will be living in Pleasant View, TN. (Isn't that a sweet name for a town?) Expect to close and move in within a few weeks.

3- Job for Julie-hope to hear news this week.

4- Vehicle for Jon found. Will purchase soon. Is a Jeep a family car? Apparently so.

5- Vehicle for Julie- soon. Decided a Lincoln Navigator was just too much of a gas guzzler, but don't care for the body shape of a Pinto...hope to find one somewhere in between, but will probably be closer to the Pinto! :)

6- Trip to Charlotte for medical testing and debriefing- done.

7- Trip to Memphis- SO enjoyed the fellowship of new and old friends.

8 - is the number of different beds we've slept in this month.

Aren't you glad to be back?

One month ago we were still in Jos.

The one statement (with a question attached) I hear most often is: "I bet you are so glad to be back, aren't you?" I think the first few times I was asked this I looked like a deer in headlights. I know that I am expected to say, "YES!" but that isn't always true. Many days, more often than not, I am ready to go back home, to Jos. Then I am reminded that this is to be home now, and the adjustments are more difficult than I thought.

Don't get me wrong, I love all of the perks of the States:
constant electricity
clean tap water
a never ending variety of food
friendships rekindled
close to family
ease of driving

But, I also miss so much. Such as,
Sarah, my sweet Nigerian sister
glass bottled cokes
fruits that were so sweet
adventures at every turn
busyness of life
pounded yam and red stew
contentment with little
and most of all, dear friends.

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

Continent Hopping

We left Nigeria at 8:00 this morning. At 8:00 PM we were standing in front of Big Ben, walking past Buckingham Palace, and enjoying the cooler weather in London. By 6:00 PM tomorrow, we will be in Nashville. Three days, three continents! Tonight we are staying at one of Jon's high school classmate's house with his three girls. As I logged in to check email (on a high speed internet connection!!), I was greeted by a few students who were also online. Within moments, I had four instant messaging conversations going on....each from a different continent! I am ever so thankful for the convenience of the internet and the way we can stay in touch and feel close even when we are very far apart.

We will catch the train into Heathrow tomorrow morning and fly out to Chicago and then Nashville. We look forward to seeing so many of our friends and family.

Worth It All

Monday was a day to swim and forget about all the hassles of the previous week and to enjoy a day without thinking of goodbyes. And it became a day I will never forget. After a quick lunch and some resting, we decided to brave the water and swim for a bit. When we got in the water, it was cold and the other side felt far away, but we were excited about the challenge and set off for the other side. The water was so muddy, we couldn't see an inch below the surface. We got caught in fishing lines and fishing nets with dead fish stuck in them. (Honestly, those fish really creeped me out.) The way over wasn't too hard at all. We laughed and talked all the way. The other side brought so much fun and we make incredible memories. At times it was cold. Very cold. At times we sunk into mud REALLY deep. We got a few cuts and bruises, but it was one of the best days ever. After a while though, we knew it was time to go back.

I was a little tired by this time and wondered where the energy would come from to get back across. The way back wasn't nearly as fun, in fact, it took some effort. The other side seemed further away the more we swam. Eventually we arrived, tired, cut, bruised, and sad it was over. But, it was worth it all.

------

Today we are finishing our packing. I feel as if I am on the other side of the lake. I do not want to swim back. Not sure where the energy will come from and I don't want it to end. But reality has hit and I began packing yesterday (finally!). The way back will be long and it might not be as much fun or as exciting. We leave smiling for what we have had here, but sobbing for all we are leaving behind. But, I can say with no hesitation, it was worth it all.

------

Schedule:

Friday (30 May) - drive to Abuja, spend night
Saturday - flight to London, spend night
Sunday - flight to Chicago, flight to Nashville, arrive in evening

Please pray for our final goodbyes, final packing, flights and connections, customs, etc.
We will be staying with friends in the Pleasant View, TN area as we continue to look for immediate housing, jobs, vehicles, etc.
We look forward to seeing many of you and catch up on life over the last two years.

A List

The last few weeks have been packed! We have celebrated birthdays, anniversaries, going-aways, and anything else we could find to celebrate. However we have been to the doctor more times in the last 2 weeks than we have in years. Exams are over. Today is the last day of school, ending with graduation tonight. Because we are still so very busy (and will be until the moment we step on the plane), I want to just share a list of all that we have experienced the last few weeks.

pain of stitches
shock of surprise parties
fatigue of malaria
inconvenience of no electricity
joy of a generator
labor of writing exams
hard work of studying for exams
fun of dressing up Nigerian style
taste of mint
mixed emotions of graduation
thrill of seeing alumni
goodness of key lime pie
congratulations of sports' awards
temperature of cooler weather
rhythm of the rains and hail
procrastination of packing up
sounds of a house full of kids
appreciation of a bore-hole
sweetness of ripening mangos
mud of soccer games
tears at senior tea
talent at art shows
music of concerts
pressure of getting everything done
concerns of the future
But most of all, the love of our life of the past two years.

Brothers/Sons

I can remember when we were thinking of moving to Africa, a few people thought that the move would be the worst thing we could do to the girls. How I wish I could share with you the joys of living here from the girls' eyes. We love the culture here....it is a protective culture with many uncles and aunties (and brothers) to help guide and love.

One of the joys of living here has been the depth of relationships we have formed. The other day I heard one of our girls call someone "a brother from another mother"-a true description of how they see some of the kids who hang out at our house. We are so blessed to have some older guys who will come over (usually to eat, I think) and yet still pay attention to the girls. They help with homework, play ball, and talk about snakes (with Nai, of course)! I can tell that the bond has truly become like siblings because they also fight like brother/sister.

Growing up with only brothers, I knew what our girls were missing out by not having someone to care for them like only a brother can. The Lord also knew that need and has provided brothers that could not be better picked for our family than if we were bound by blood. Along with the girls enjoying their brothers, Jon and I feel as if we have gained sons. I love our sons! I am so blessed.

Recently I took a few boys into town for one to buy a phone. As I watched Naomi freely interact with these 6 foot boys from various parts of the world, I became a wee bit emotional and my heart smiled. As we crossed the busy street, one grabbed her hand to help her get safely across. Whether it is joking around or lending a hug, these boys have been there for my girls. My girls are blessed.

How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard. ~Carol Sobieski and Thomas Meehan, Annie

8th Grade Banquet

Great Anticipation
Much Preparation
Fancy Dresses
Sharp Suits
Roses Given
Muddy Ground
Food Devoured
Excellent Manners
Many Photos
Sleep Overs
No Slumber
All Over

Discipleship Party

Every Thursday, the 39 eighth graders break up into boy and girl discipleship classes which Jon and I lead. We have had such a great time with our own group. jon's group of guys seem to always end up playing soccer or basketball-imagine that! My group of girls never had trouble filling our time talking, praying, laughing (and dancing-LOL!) So, for our final time of getting together, we invited everyone to our home for a cookout. We had fun eating, playing ball, talking, celebrating a birthday, and pouring water all over each other. (WHY do we find that SO fun???!) We will miss these kids so very much. Although we will continue to pray for them, nothing beats a good game of basketball and few dance moves to REALLY stay in touch!

I am blessed.

This week has been a rough one emotionally for me. My late brother's birthday was this week and still I miss him so very much. Some hard conversations were had with those I dearly love as I prepare to leave. I feel the pressure of getting much done and yet the need to fully embrace and enjoy the precious few days ahead. A hard week. A very hard week.

The weekend began with the first of many goodbyes. On Friday night we headed to friends' house for a dinner and a farewell party. Farewell was said to three families who are leaving Nigeria this month. Much laughter and even a few more tears were shared. On Sunday Jon and I drove out to Miango (about 40 minutes of VERY bumpy roads) to say farewell to another couple who his heading back to New Zealand after serving 17 years in Nigeria! On the way back, I got sick. So very sick.

But we returned home to find a PARTY waiting for us. What a joy it was to see so many of my favorite people here in our house. (Even though they had ALL kept this party a big surprise from me-and I rarely like surprises! But this one, I loved!)
As I went around the room and thought of each person there, I realized how truly blessed I am. The four teachers I work most closely with were to my right. They have listened to, laughed and cried with and worked beside me every day for the last two years. I could never ask for better co-workers! Jon and the girls were next-just smiling as big as could be.

Then, scattered throughout the room were my former students. I love them dearly. No explanation as to why they hang here so much, but I am glad they do. We spent the rest of the evening sharing memories and making new ones. If I could have stopped time, I would have stopped it then. So very thankful that a hard week had an incredible ending! I am blessed.

Harley Girl

We had company for dinner a few weeks ago. We visited with Shammah and his wife over a big meal and enjoyed the sweet laughter! Shammah works for Youth Camp Alive-a ministry Jon oversees. We have grown to love Shammah and his new wife, Keturah. Saying 'goodbye' to them, in preparation for our leaving, was very difficult. However, Naomi seemed to especially enjoy Shammah's motorbike rides! Hopefully she won't ask for a Harley-Davidson for her next birthday.

One Month

Only month from today until we fly out of Nigeria. This fact brings much sadness as we leave a place we have grown to love and call home. These past two years have flown by (ESPECIALLY this year) and we can't believe it is time to think of packing again. Lauren and I were driving around today mentioning how beautiful Jos is....not our first impression! But this area full of trees, huge rocks, best of friends and rewarding work has become very precious to us. If you want to see a short video of a trip around Jos, check out what a fellow missionary, Joel, has posted on Youtube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A6M4-BwzIjw&feature=related

Someone recently mentioned a few ways to make sure we say "good" goodbyes. After much thinking about it, I seem to believe there are times when there is no good in goodbye. When we leave, we are saying bye to a lifestyle, our home, our work, a culture, the country of Nigeria, but most importantly, our friends. How do you say goodbye to so much and so many you love? I have yet to find out, but I'm working on it....and it may take a month!


Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same. ~Flavia Weedn

The Big Banquet

The junior class hosted the banquet for the seniors. The theme was "Phantom of the Opera" and the decor included massive amounts of fabric, many candles, a large chandelier, a grand piano, and lots of roses! The junior class worked so hard to make every detail memorable. The two classes spent a few nights prior to the banquet in dance classes. They enjoyed dancing a variety of dances, including the cha cha, tango, waltz, and a few line dances!

A Magical Weekend

Spent Thursday, Friday, and Saturday nights watching our school’s production of “Cinderella”-a very funny musical! The kids did an excellent job. The orchestra was staffed with middle school students and two ninth graders! Keeping with tradition, the cast and crew made Saturday’s performance EXTRA fun. When the ball was in full swing with a (boring) waltz, Prince Charming stopped the dancing and announced, “so much for the waltz, let’s do some real dancing.” On cue, the cast broke out with the Cha Cha Slide-music AND dance!

To the right now, to the left
Take it back now ya’ll
1 hop this time, 1 hop this time
Right foot 2 stomps, left foot 2 stomps
Slide to the left, slide to the right
Criscross, criscross
Cha Cha real smooth

For such a small school in a remote area, Hillcrest did not disappoint. The costumes were fabulous. The props rocked. (Lauren was in charge of the props!) The incredible orchestra was hidden in a pit below stage. “Fairy dust” flew down when magic occurred and Cinderella’s transformation brought “ohhs” and “ahhs” from the audience.

These past few weeks I have learned:

The nutritional value (esp. protein) is higher in termites than grasshoppers
Grading research papers is more time consuming than writing them
Laughter is a wonderful medicine
You can keep going long after you think you can’t
30 7th graders can eat a lot of ice cream
Leaving is much harder than going
A broken toe really, really hurts
Why cashew nuts cost so much (have you seen how the grow—too cool!)
When one of my kids hurts, my heart hurts too (even more than a broken toe)
That it isn’t what you have in your life, but whom you have that counts
Lauren’s smile (minus the braces-yep, finally got them off) is BEAUTIFUL
Blondes don’t necessarily have more fun than brunettes
How to make cream cheese
Life is too short to not enjoy every moment
Sleep is optional (at least for a while)
A few hundred naira can, sometimes, get you out of trouble

---and I still have so much more to learn!

(7th grade class at party on Saturday)

I've Been Tagged

I have been "tagged" many times before, but I have always ignored them. However, about a month ago I promised Stephanie (hey, Steph!) I would post my answers to hers. So (a month later!) I am fulfilling my promise. Finally. This is how it works: I replaced her answers for my own. Hope this makes you happy, my friend.

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
just my middle name---named after my brother's kindergarten girlfriend, I think.


2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
recently.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
I think so. haven't really thought about it.


4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE LUNCH MEAT?
deli peppered turkey.


5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
three daughters I gave birth to, and many others that call me mama.


6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
absolutely....and we'd have a blast!


7. WHAT IS YOUR GUILTY INDULGENCE?
being alone. and grape.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
yup...and i've never broken a bone!


9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
already have. loved it. wanna do it again.


10. WHAT CHORE DO YOU LEAST LIKE?
making someone unhappy, even when it is necessary.


11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
99.9% of the time I wear flip flops. .1% I untie.


12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?
yes. but not lately.


13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
not a fan of ice cream....but if I eat, it is mint choc chip. only. 


14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
eyes. 


15. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOR?
brown.


16. DO YOU LIKE WILDFLOWERS OR ARRANGEMENTS?
any flower- fresh and handpicked.


17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
my girlfriends. desperately miss them. and of course my brothers. and mom. and dad. and Target.


18. WHAT DO YOU DO WITH YOUR SPARE TIME?
what spare time?


19. WHAT IS SOMETHING THAT WOULD SURPRISE ME ABOUT YOU?
i always score as an introvert on personality tests.


20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
rice.


21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
itunes....a WIDE variety of music!


22. WHAT DO YOU COLLECT?
i used to collect antique scales. now i collect class passes.


23. WHAT ARE YOUR THREE FAVOURITE SMELLS?
rain
gardenia
cinnamon


24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
Saira


25. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE POSSESSION?
my photos. and letters from those I love. 


26. FAVOURITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
soccer. bball. or whatever my hubby, kids, or people i know are playing.


27. HAIR COLOR?
blonde-ish.


28. EYE COLOR?
green. everyone else in my family has blue eyes. beautiful blue. 


29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
not since a series of eye surgeries! yippee.


30. FAVOURITE FOOD?
salad. honestly.


31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
happy. or ones that make me think. 


32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
remember the titans. with my class.


33. WHAT ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW?
white tank top and old faded levis and a watch.


34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
fall. or dry season.


35. HUGS OR KISSES?
real hugs.


36. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
snakes.


37. DRINK OF CHOICE?
anything carbonated, with ice. but am quitting soon. very soon.


38. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST ACCOMPLISHMENT LATELY?
learning to drive stick shift last year. freedom!


39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
finished re-reading Gabaldon's series. the best. my favorite.


40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
no mouse pad. hate mice. love touch pad.


41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT?
no tv. hardly ever watch tv. but I did just fly through a dvd of prison break, season two.


42. FAVORITE SOUND?
laughter. the kind that makes your eyes water.


43. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
where is home?

Wanna play? just leave your anwers in the comment section, email them, or provide a link.

There is a Hair on My Ham

Working full time has left me missing being in the kitchen. So, during breaks, I enjoy cooking. However, everything seems to take so much longer…from shopping and preparing to the actual cooking. However, we still managed to round up a yummy meal for a memorable Easter dinner.

The morning of Easter I began to prepare the ham. Upon opening the bag it had been in, I found the ham to be covered with hair...as in the hair from the pig! I cut off the entire hide (hair and all) and left enough fat on the outside to keep it moist while cooking. I had a brief thought of making pork rinds, but it didn’t last long at all. (I think the hair helped change my mind very quickly!) Once the ‘yucky’ was cut off, we realized there wasn’t much meat left so we quickly roasted a chicken to add to the meat platter.

Lauren loves deviled eggs, so we bought a bunch of eggs from our neighbors and prepared a special treat. One of Lauren’s friends was spending the weekend with us, so we put her to work filling the whites. (Aren’t all Easter dinners required to have some type of egg dish to use up all the colored ones?)

My grandmother used to make the BEST squash casserole. I found a vegetable in the market that was light green and eggplant shaped and assumed it might be zucchini, so I took a chance. The final dish tasted quite similar to my grandmother's and it was a joy to have Nanny’s cooking on our table.

Mashed potatoes (and gravy) are a must for any big meal at the Parkers. Our potatoes here are so small and we often spend too long trying to peel them. . I used a new trick I had recently learned. I do think I am the ONLY person alive that didn’t know this. Did you know that if you boil the potatoes first, the skins just slide right off? Well, I didn’t. This trick saved us many minutes peeling…and only a few fingers were burned.

When my mom visited in December, she brought us something VERY special: Stove Top Stuffing! Oh my…we had been saving this for three months and it was well worth the wait!

The dessert was chocolate, of course! We made a chocolate trifle-homemade brownies, homemade cool whip and chocolate pudding we’ve been saving….RICH but worth every calorie. ☺

And the ham? It turned out delicious…not a hair was to be found by the time it hit our plates!

AIDS Walk-a-Thon

The students spent the last few weeks looking for pledges and preparing. On Saturday, they gathered at the school track to walk laps to help raise money for AIDS. The walk lasted for two hours under the hot sun, but each walker persevered. Over $1000 was raised!

I am only one, but I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can do something. And I will not let what I cannot do interfere with what I can do. ~Edward Everett Hale